Saturday, March 04, 2006

POEMS


FEMALE POEM

I want a man who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen all day long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I want him to be gainfully employed,
And when I spend his cash, not be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! For a man who makes love to my mind,
and knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I want this man to love me to no end,
And forever be my very best friend.



MALE POEM

I want a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs
who owns a liquor store, a Chocolate Shop and a fishing boat.
I know this doesn't rhyme, but I don't care.


cq

And a huge thankyou to Mah Sweet Georgia Rose for telling me how to get music on my blog - hope you enjoy my choices :-)

12 comments:

CyberKitten said...

Men get *such* a bad press.... Bless 'em. {snigger]

Lazy Daisy said...

Are you the poet? If so, you've gotten bad press all your life...ditch those negative tapes for some postive ones. You rock! Bowing to your brilliance my queen!

craziequeen said...

sadly no - I've failed again [wrinkles nose]

This was an email sent to me...

I haven't rhymed for years.... :-(

cq

YellowRose said...

You are very welcome....and I have to say you have excellant taste in music!!! I Love Queen!!!

You are "The" Queen!!! *hugs*

YellowRose said...

Oh and "Dancing Queen" EXCELLENT!!! I am dancing in my seat...so cool! Love this music!

MaR said...

I was catching up on your posts, cq, it's been a few days. Hope you are having a great sunday !!!

Jean-Luc Picard said...

A delightful post! I wonder how many will say, "It's true!"?

ribbiticus said...

hiya my dear cq! great post! posted something similar to this on my blog yesterday. do check it out and let me know if you agree. :)

Paste said...

In the same vein:-

Dictionary for Decoding Women's Personal Ads:

40-ish ........................ 49.
Adventurous .............. Slept with everyone.
Athletic ...................... No breasts
Average looking .......... Moooo.
Beautiful .................... Pathological liar.
Emotionally Secure ... On medication.
Feminist .................... Fat
Free spirit .................. Junkie
Friendship first .......... Former slut.
New-Age ................... Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-Fashioned ........... No BJs.
Open-minded ............. Desperate
Outgoing ................... Loud and Embarrassing.
Professional .............. Bitch
Voluptuous ................ Very Fat
Hugh frame ............... Hugely Fat
Wants soul mate ....... Stalker

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry - You'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!
10. You're certainly attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH:

1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = Let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.
11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit - I'm gay

Sleepypete said...

Heh - I had that "we need to talk" when I was halfway through an 8 hour driving day ... I'd picked up my (now-)ex about thirty minutes before and was back into driving mode. And it was raining and there were nutters around me on the road ...

If there was ever a "we need to talk" time - it wasn't then !

OldLady Of The Hills said...

I LOVE THIS MUSIC! It's a GREAT addition to your already wonderful blog, my dear CQ.

I've gotta ask YellowRose how to do this, too! I bet it's really hard, huh? (LOL) Seriously, if you didn't know how to do this it must have been difficult to do, yes?

I love the poems btw...SOOOO True! OY!

Anonymous said...

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