Wednesday, January 30, 2008

It's Summer and the Living is Easy

I had a bit of a clear out of our kitchen pinboard and took down a newspaper cutting that my mother sent to me years ago.
With (admittedly light!) snow forecast for us in the next couple of days, and the ensuing traffic chaos 'cos no one seems to know how to drive in 1/4" of snow here.......I give you all 'thoughts of Summer'......
An electric hedge-trimmer is competing in a decibel contest with a petrol lawnmower. The cacophony is exacerbated by the buzz of a strimmer and the piercing sound of an electric drill.
The distorted electronic wail of the ice-cream vendor invites a bribe from the disinterested parent, as the volume of music playing at another pseudo-Californian barbeque is drowned out by a bitter argument.
Sweating neighbours and family members are slouched in plastic chairs on uneven patios. Others wait impatiently as friends studiously ignore the new decking, thoughtlessly positioned close to a neighbouring property. They will talk long into the night, their conversation slowly reduced by alcohol to meaningless, unintelligible garbage, interspersed with drunken laughter and mindless expletives.
The delightful chatter of children, mindful of their parents advice to respect the Sabbath, is a sad, distant memory. Now, a strange hissing sound announces the arrival of a grotesque structure. A lurid inflatable castle rises up like a cartoon nightmare. The wall of noise begins to close in around the night shift worker desperate for a few hours' sleep.
Smoke from the barbeque wafts around the neighbourhood, as the stench of overcooked burgers fills the air. The slamming of car doors heralds the discharge from another visit to the supermarket. Across the road, the departure for the 'theme' pub to celebrate another decree absolute is loudly proclaimed.
The gently, echoing clop of a horse passes by unheard. Welcome to a summer Sunday in the 21st Century.
Written by Tim Carbus of Guiseley West Yorks and published in the Daily Mail.

Now, come on - doesn't that all just make you yearn for long summer days.....?
cq
[representing local chapter of Cynics Anonymous)

7 comments:

Sleepypete said...

I'll be driving up and across to Lincolnshire on Friday so we can get munchies to celebrate my dad's birthday. He was 65 yesterday. (Yes - I did remember to phone !)

Hopefully the traffic chaos won't be too bad and that the snow forecast will scare all the muppets off the roads :-)

Le laquet said...

Yep ... bring it (and some sunshine) on!

Juggling Mother said...

Well, not being one to disagree with the Daily Mail, but my ummer Sundays seem to be a bit more like this:

The Sergent at arms is competing in a decibel contest with thelocal wildlife

The distorted whistle of the kettle invites a bribe from the newbie, as the volume of soldiers drilling is drowned out by a friendly skirmish

Sweating knights and family members are crowded aroudthe fire. Others discuss the authenticity of their kit. They will talk long into the night, their conversation slowly reduced by alcohol to intence specuation on exactly how simple aspects of life were completed, interspersed with drunken laughter and mindless singing

The delightful chatter of children, mindful of their parents advice to respect the Swords, is a heard in the distance. One will expalin the history of the castle to the others in lurid detail. The singing merges with the dreams of those catching a few hours' sleep

Smoke from the fire wafts around the camp, as the aroma's of pottage fills the air. The slamming of car doors heralds the influx of MOPs ready to learn and experience something new. Across the field, the departure for the court scene to celebrate another hanging is loudly proclaimed

The gently, echoing clop of a horse passes by, the turns into the thunder of a joust. Welcome to a summer Sunday in the 21st Century.

Dianne said...

That brought back memories - both of childhood and summer.

I just looked outside at my bare patio with all the furniture covered in tarp.

Truly looking forward to warmer days - I love the spring.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Ah, the summer breeze of yesteryear.

Pat said...

Tell you what! I think Spring must be here 'cos I have just got rid of the Zillions of cobwebs in the garage which we use as a laundry room - and the rest. I didn't fancy brushing it all down on me so used my Henry vacuum. I allowed two days and finished in a morning. Yippee!
Michele send her best.

carmilevy said...

That is one great piece of writing. I like how he painted the picture with sound. Took me right back to summers close to home.

As I scraped the car off after last night's massive snow/ice storm, I had thoughts like this. Warmth would be good right about now. But we're tempering it with observations of the dog: he LOVES the snow. It's such a scream to watch him bound through it like a jackrabbit, burying his nose deep at every opportunity.