Lazy Sunday

It'll be quiet on the blogs today as people around the world watch the Wimbledon Men's Final. No British player in this final of the British tennis tournament - no surprises there.....our tennis players play like our football teams!

So how am I doing? Apart from a couple of enjoyable hours on the high seas in the company of Capt Jack Sparrow,

I am still very down. I don't know why, although I have a good idea.

In respect of the title, today is NOT a lazy day at the Palace - yesterday was my lazy day. A day spent catching up on all that lovely TV I had stored on Sky+. A day when, despite the lure of lots of episodes of Blue Murder starring the delicious Joel Keller, I sank lower and lower.

Today is playing catch-up. Lots of laundry. MB is back from his kitcar racing weekend (probably bringing me more laundry!) and I have tidied and cleaned and changed kitty trays and my pile of ironing is growing.
My car needs to go back to the windscreen place as the sealant has worked loose, and our washing line is on it's last legs. Life, eh?

I may not be leaving comments on blogs, but I am visiting you all. I'm just not in a talkative mood.

As ever, I don't like talking about my condition - but sometimes, well, life just gets too much.....nothing drastic, just the effort of existing is a chore. Perhaps I'll be better tomorrow....or the day after.......or the day after that...

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But What about the Rum??

So, surprise, surprise - I went to see this on the opening night.....and dragged along most of my crazies; cyberkitten, sleepypete, bionicdwarf, rca and K.

What did I think?

Well, it may have slipped some of your notice, but I am a hardened Deppite. I love the guy and I love his characterisation of Jack. Which is good, cos this movie Jacked us all out. So much Jack we were almost stifled by it.
The jokes were mostly strong, and lots of them referred back to PotC 1.

The main characters were rehired; Depp, Knightley, Bloom (of course), and Jonathan Pryce, Mackenzie Crook, Kevin McNally, Lee Arenberg and the gorgeous Jack Davenport - and this time they were joined by Bill Nighy, Stellan Skarsgard and the delicious Naomie Harris.

Plot?
Jack Sparrow is hunting the key to Davy Jones' locker whilst trying to avoid repaying a life debt to the ruler of the ocean depths, Will is hunting Jack, Elizabeth is hunting Will and Commodore Norrington has fallen on hard times.
Jack and his friends must use all their wits and wiles to escape the clutches of Davy Jones and the infamous Kraken.

Thoughts?
Well, first of all, yet another original and entertaining entrance by Capt Sparrow. The characters are familiar and the film, although rather long, was *very* entertaining. There was so much going on! I am looking forward to seeing it again in a couple of days. I was entertained, I was amused and I was intrigued (that sounds like money's worth already!)

And the ending brought on spontaneous applause from the audience (no clues, if you know please don't put spoilers in the comments!)

Johnny IS Jack.....the part was made for him (actually, it *was* - literally built around his ideas and thoughts! Gold teeth, hair, costume, slurred speech, tics - all JD's ideas!).
Gore Verbinski is a master of direction when it comes to fun adventure. And this is what this was - an adventurous frolic. Stealing concepts from a million other films (and did I notice Depp's influence in a few moments of French Farce?) it neatly knitted them all into one fun movie.
Add on a nail-biting cliffhanger ending - and you have a continuing swahbuckling epic!

Oh, and kudos on the Kraken - cyberkitten and I agreed; it looked very like the old Norwegian 'engravings' (thank you, ck - d'uh! old photos!!) of the legendary creature!

Not the original, but a fun sequel which seems to lead directly into the third part!

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7th July 2005

52 Innocent Lives Snatched Away

52 Families Rent Apart

52 Prayers

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Reasons I am Content to Admire JD from afar:

1. I am essentially a boring person, I mean what on EARTH would we talk about - the price of croissants today??

2. He is notorious for being disdainful if he dislikes someone.

3. He probably wouldn't like me.

4. He has a BEAUTIFUL woman already in his life. Trust me, with Vanessa on his arm - he wouldn't want me!

5. Said beautiful woman bore him two children that he adores.

6. Even if I was in that position, I couldn't break that up.

7. I would be so tongue-tied I would appear foolish. I don't like appearing foolish.

8. I'm two years younger than him, but feel a million years older.

9. We would have nothing in common.

10. He loves playing practical jokes - I hate them.

11. Stalking is illegal in the UK.

12. The words Number One Fan have such a dreadful connotation, thanks to Stephen King - anyway, I'm probably about his Number 2,623,478th Fan...

13. It's never gonna happen, so I'll just continue to admire him from afar - well from a cinema seat tomorrow (yeehaw! We're going to Pirates tomorrow!!)

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(I'm not obsessive - I'm suffering a bit with the depression this week, and Pirates is my focus. I mean; it was this or 'Thirteen Things about My Week' - I got to number three and felt suicidal (Suicide by Boredom!).... I couldn't submit you to that torture!)

Wordless Wednesday - One Thing on my Mind

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Fourth of July

To my American Blogbuddies.......

Happy Fourth of July!

I hope you are spending it with friends, loved ones or sweet, sweet memories!

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Walt and Clara

I'm thrilled to announce,

Clara and Walt are engaged!!

(virtual wedding date to be set) and

the baby is due January 2007

(is this to be the first virtual blogbaby, I wonder?)

And to put all their friends minds at rest - Walt is to continue as my butler/valet, and Clara will set up home ready for the baby and break in a new maid. I will be holding interviews shortly.......

OK, hands up all those who thought I was gonna be a grumpy boss?? [big grin]

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Part 3 - Truth or Dare

OK, I’ve spoken to Clara and Walt…..and I think they are both lying to me – so it’s put up or shut up time at the Palace.

[both staff troop in looking worried]

OK, you two. I know you have both lied to me. Clara – you lied about being pregnant and Walt – you lied about knowing.

So how about a little truth here? Let’s start with you, Clara…..

Yes mum. Well, when I found out I was pregnant I was scared I would lose my job. You wouldn’t want a bulgy maid. But I had to tell someone, so I told Walt – and made him promise to keep my secret.

Why did you make cyberkitten think he was the father?

I was worried I would not be able to raise a baby – and he seemed a nice man.

So, now it’s time to be honest……. Who IS the father??

Alright. Do you know... the muffin man?

The muffin man?

The muffin man.

Yes, I know the muffin man. Who lives on Drury Lane?

It’s the muffin man...

The muffin man?!

THE MUFFIN MAN!

But – he’s married…….

Yes mum. I know. I was stupid, but he told me his wife didn’t love him any more…..

Well, now that’s out in the open – Walt, why did you lie to me about knowing?

Ma’am, the poor girl was distraught, she needed a trusted confidante. Once the shock had worn off I intended to come and speak to you.

About the pregnancy?

No – about my plans to marry Clara.

[silence]

so - now the truth is out and everyone knows where they stand, I have to think what to do next.......... What do you think I should do?

Part 2 - Performance Review Time at the Palace

[takes long invigorating slurp of coffee]

[solemn knocking at door]

Ah, Walt. Come on in and sit yourself down.

Thank you ma’am.

It’s that time of year again, annual review of your performance.

Yes ma’am.

First of all, did you have a nice time in Los Angeles?

Yes, thank you ma’am. I have also downloaded lots of photos for you.

How nice. Our Lady spoke very highly of your services, apparently she was very pleased with your efforts.

I aim to please, ma’am

[cough] hmm – so she led me to believe. Anyway, your performance this year has been very impressive.

[colours slightly] thank you ma’am

You were positively diffident and virtually 2-dimensional before my blogparty. But with all the to-ing and fro-ing you seemed to blossom and afterwards became a new person.

Yes ma’am

Although I did notice a preference for serving my female guests, any particular reason?

Well, ma’am, Clara seemed to have the men well in hand…….

[chokes back snigger] Yes, well, since then you have served me well and also have done sterling service overseas.

Yes ma’am.

Walt?

Yes ma’am.

Did you know Clara is pregnant?

[very long pause]

No ma’am

[to be continued]

cor, this is like Days of Our Lives, isn’t it??? Who is the father? Is Clara fibbing? Is Walt lying? What am I going to do with this situation? Tune in tomorrow for the next instalment!

Part 1 - Performance Review Time at the Palace

[gentle tapping at the Royal study door]

Hi, Clara, come on in and sit down. As you know I like to give my staff feedback on their performance over the year, and I think now is a good time to do your review.

Yes mum

Did you have a nice time in California at Our Lady's house?

Yes mum

And you had that extra day, of course. Sightseeing in Hollywood, with Walt of course. I hope you had a lovely time?

Yes mum

Well, I have to tell you that overall this year you have worked hard and conscientiously.

Yes mum

But I noticed a downturn in performance after my blogparty.

Yes mum

And then your behaviour became erratic, you had a lot of sick days and your performance suffered. Can you explain that?

Yes mum

[long silence]

Well, as you’re not going to, I guess I could have a stab at the reason?

Yes mum

You’re pregnant, aren’t you?

Yes mum

You knew you were pregnant and you didn’t tell me, your employer?

Yes mum

Do you know who the father is?

Yes mum

[even longer silence - a veritable pregnant pause]

Well, I guess it’s up to me again……..is cyberkitten the father ?

No mum

[to be continued.........]

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Reasons Why I Love Johnny Depp.........

1. His eyes. A girl could get very lost in those beautiful brown eyes. btw - did anyone else know he wears tinted contact lenses in the PotC movies because his eyes are sensitive to the sun?

2. His hair. Never the same. Never totally under control, but always.......well touchable.....

3. His principles. Always his choice of films on his terms.

4. The reason he made the first PotC movie - for his children, so they could see Daddy in a film.

5. His sense of humour. I have seen interviews with Johnny D and he has a wicked sense of humour, but subtle - you know?

6. The tattoo on his hand that few people know about because it's usually made over. 'We were sitting around talking about new tattoos and I said 'do one on me now, on this hand' my friend said what do you want, I just said 'I dunno, just........oh, just tattoo a 3 on there!'' and hey presto, JD has the tattoo of a number three on his left hand between the thumb and forefinger.

7. That tattoo was mostly covered by a grubby bandage or a carefully placed dirt smudge in PotC1.

8. He has a tattoo of his mum's name 'Betty Sue' with a heart. He is devoted to his mum, even takes her to awards and stuff!

9. His first film was Nightmare on Elm Street where he was eaten by a bed - he is inordinately proud of that accolade!

10. He resolutely refuses to be part of the Hollywood 'Machine', preferring to live in a secluded villa in France.

11. He loves to play Barbie with daughter Lily Rose - and play pirates with son Jack!

12. He has just been voted the best autograph-giver in the business!

13. He has an indefinable quality. He always appears almost touchable, tangible. Watching him on the screen, he seems to be almost within reach.....



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Wordless Wednesday

Happy Birthday Naomi!!

Today is The Day!!

It’s Our Lady's birthday today!

As I understand it, she is a sprightly 25 today!

And she’s throwing a huge virtual party for all her blogbuddies. So follow the link above for champagne and chocolate cake - all non-fattening, 'cos it's Virtual!

I have my dress….

And polished up my bling……..



Dusted off my crown………



And even got a little posy for the Birthday Girl…….
Right, I'm ready - time to go to the party!!

More later.......

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Monday Memory

Today it's a memory tied to a Person.......how clever am I??

OK, picture this.....1979, flares, Queen, Star Trek the Motion Picture, the Bee Gees, and Butterflies. BUTTERFLIES??

Yup, in 1979 the BBC was showing a TV sitcom called Butterflies which starred, amongst other future luminaries of British stage and screen, Geoffrey Palmer. Here he is with Dame Judi Dench, starring in 'As Time Goes By' recently.

Photographer: Rob Ebdon©2000 BBC

Butterflies was filmed in our town; not only our town, but some scenes (specifically Geoffrey's) were filmed in our road! As the series had two rather nice young men in it and I was a fourteen year old oozing hormones, I decided to go over and ask for some autographs - perhaps one of them would 'notice' me!

I didn't get as far as the young men, as one of the cast was amazingly brutal with me and reduced me to tears in about 10 seconds flat. Enter - Geoffrey!

He took me to one side and helped me into the Mini that was famous the length and breadth of the UK.

And he talked to me, me - a fourteen year old neurotic mess! Not only did he talk to me, but that lovely man listened to me too. I was miserable at home and miserable at school - but this man wanted to know about ME. We talked about school, acting, music lessons, TV - all sorts of stuff.

OK, so it was nearly 30yrs ago, but I still remember how I felt. I felt human, whole - a real person. Not an awkward daughter, a pain in the arse little sister or a bullied classmate - I was me.

Geoffrey Palmer more than likely doesn't remember his chance meeting with the weeping teenager, but she remembers him with gratitude and warmth.

And I didn't even get his autograph!

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Craziequeen's People

Sunday again. Dinner done, just got the ironing to do and put the clothes away and then it's Monday and the whole 'week' thing starts again.

Today's Person may come as a bit of a surprise to most. He does not fit into the normal Craziequeen People mould.

This roughhewn Texan is The Undertaker. He has been a stalwart of the World Wrestling Entertainment for 16 years, and was the main reason I watched every week for ten years; to get a look at the Taker, the American BadAss, the man who danced with the devil weekly at 9 (the last one is mine, do you like it?)

But behind all the 'entertainment' is the man, Mark Callaway. 44 years old, 6'8", 300lbs, married with children. Like all wrestlers throwing themselves off the equivalent of small buildings, Mark has battled substance and alcohol abuse. He has recovered from hip and knee surgery and is only now considering retirement.

Some like the pretty boys, and some like the dirty players. Some tune in for the 'storylines' and some tune in for the Divas. Me? It has to be Undertaker all the way, big, bad and dangerous to know.

I found this quote in an article;

Without exception, his peers describe him as a locker room leader, a veteran extremely generous with his time and experience. "When he says it's his yard, it really is," says Edge (Adam Copeland). "Backstage, you KNOW that he's the man."

His legacy encompasses not just his skill, agility, size and longevity in the world of professional wrestling, but his reputation as a genuine leader among his many peers. As much as the fans will remember the many faces of the Undertaker and his enormous contribution to sports entertainment, it seems that the locker room will remember Mark Callaway, the man, even more.

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Craziequeen's People

I wasn't going to put bloggers on here, but this morning I changed my mind.

Today's person is the gifted, the talented, the funny........

Miss Deni Bonet!! [pause for applause]

you can find her blog here.......

and here is the reason why she is my 'Person' today.......

Great American Music Hour

I love this song!

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for those that don't know, this is my way of dealing with the constant diet of World Cup this and World Cup that.......People - real People....

Frolicking Friday

Enough of this 'family' stuff.......

It's Friday, time to have FUN with my friends!

Running Doe, a young Native American woman went to a doctor for her first ever physical exam. After checking all of her vitals and running the usual tests, the doctor said, "Well, Running Doe, you are in fine health. I could find no problems. I did notice one abnormality however."
"Oh, what is that, Doctor?"
"Well, you have no nipples."
"None of the people in my tribe have nipples," she replied.
"That is amazing," said the doctor. "I'd like to write this up for The South Dakota Journal of Medicine if you don't mind.
She said, "OK."
"First of all" asked the doctor, "how many people are in your Tribe?"
She answered, "Approximately 500."
"And what is the name of your tribe?" asked the doctor.
Running Doe replied, "We're called ...


(You know me, I hate to do this to you)


(I really do hate to do this to you;


LIKE Hell! I love it!)


"The Indiannippleless Five Hundred!"

***********************************

WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, cheque or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh,
rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.

MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
"It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes.
"He addressed the man, "Can you name your wife's favourite flower?"
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Homepride, isn't it?

WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument andneither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."

W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time."
The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.
"The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says..........
"HEBREWS"

THE SILENT TREATMENT
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

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This week thanks go to bionicdwarf and 'Huw from work' for providing the giggles.

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about 'that' Happy Family.......

[Wordless Wednesday below]

1. From the left - that's my Daddy. Mother and Daddy divorced when I was 5 or 6. It wasn't amicable, and this is, as far as I know, the only remaining photo with both parents in it.

2. Daddy died when I was 17. I never really got to know him well, a bit of a shame as I seem to remember he was a nice guy.

3. Next to Daddy and curled into his shoulder is my sister H, 5 years older than me. H ran away from home at 14 and went to live with Daddy.

4. I idolised her as a child, and bitterly resented that she got to live with Daddy (although later I found they had their own problems).

5. H despises me and we haven't spoken for over 10 years. I know she despises me, because she told me so - in a very long letter.

6. Next is my brother J. I adored J, we were only two years apart and were the only children at home during the most tumultuous years in our family. He bullied me terribly, but he was my brother.

7. J hates me. He refuses to have anything to do with me. He thinks I am evil.

8. When I was ill I tried to get in touch with J about five years ago. I was contacted by a friend of his and told to stay away and never to try and get in touch again.

9. Little button features is me. Such innocence, such naivete! Not a lot changes even after nearly 40 years! Love the reins!

10. Then there's big brother A, 6 years my senior. The steadfast one. Passed all his exams, excelled at Cambridge, excellent job, fantastic family etc - always one black sheep in the family! He did a lot of the 'Daddy' jobs when I was a child - took me to school, taught me to ride a bike, taught me to play poker!

11. And my Mother. A strict disciplinarian. Life had to be on her terms, as did relationships. Even now, I never know where I stand with her. One minute calm, the next stormy seas.

12. So there you have it. Like all families, it is a myth exploded. I don't believe there is such a thing as a Happy Family.....but I always dreamed of one.

13. As a child I wanted to be Laura Ingalls or Elizabeth Walton. But no - I'm just me.......

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Wordless Wednesday

Happy Families??

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Rumour Central

Latest rumour........

Johnny Depp is looking to buy a home in Bath.........that's oh - about 30 miles from me.....



[faints]

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