Friday, September 30, 2005

Glassy Stare

OK, I have now officially been on my new regime for a week. I have walked, cycled and strode up and down stairs. I have forsaken all those junk foods I love - and replaced them with fruit.

At this point most health nuts say 'oh, but it's great, I feel so much better for it!'........

To be honest, I am absolutely creamcrackered. Totally whipped - so much so that my bed is looking appealing at 9.10 in the evening. This is the life of a masochist - and I am attempting to embrace it!

Let's be honest - I like junk food! I like chocolate muffins, cookies and crisps. I like mint choc chip ice cream and custard (not together mind, but that isn't actually a bad idea!). I like fruit - but not every day.

Of course I could eat rice cakes (bleurgh!), or yoghurt (double bleurgh!), or those little drinky things (why do people drink those??). But why spend all that money on fancy diet foods when I can have a delicious sweet juicy orange :-)

To make matters worse, HWMBO has departed on a late summer jaunt with his mate, and this is usually when I treat myself to sweet things we don't normally have in the house. But I resolutely picked up monkey nuts and nectarines and about a ton of salad stuff from the supermarket shelves, with low cal dressing and low cal coleslaw.

According to My Pumpkin, who has awarded me a Gold Star for my efforts in week one, week one is the hardest. I smiled sweetly and agreed - all the while eyeing up the cookies in the kitchenette.

But I have not wavered, and I have not wilted. I have let no delicious chocolatey junk food pass my lips, and I have stubbornly exercised daily. Bring on Week Two!

As an end note - craziequeen passes on her love to Aginoth, who was admitted to hospital today for treatment (you can see all the news on Mrs A's Blog - linked). And craziequeen also confesses that, no matter how crap she feels, it probably isn't a patch on what Aginoth is going through.


Make the Most of What You've Got

What follows is a real application from a student received by ************ University.
Question 3A - Essay: In order for the admissions staff of our university to get to know you, the applicant, better, we ask that you answer the following question:
Are there any significant experiences you have had, or accomplishments you have realised, that have helped to define you as a person?

I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Kenyan refugees, I write award-winning operas, and manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.

I woo women with my sensuous godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, I cook thirty-minute brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I single handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I had trials with Manchester United, I am the subject of numerous documentaries.

When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my garden. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie.

Critics worldwide swoon over my original line in corduroy evening wear. I do not perspire! I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have appeared on Through the Keyhole and won the big gold key. Last summer I toured Eastern Europe with a travelling centrifugal -force demonstration. I run the 100m in 9.65 secs. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in the international botany circles.

Children trust me.

I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick and David Copperfield in one day and refurbished and entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The law of physics do not apply to me.

I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic and my bills are all paid. On weekends I let off some steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down.

I have made extraordinary four course meals using only vegetables and a Breville Toaster. I breed prize winning clams.

I have won bullfights in Madrid, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka and chess competitions at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and have spoken with Elvis.

But I have not yet been to the University of Southampton.




Thursday, September 29, 2005

Ay to Zee of the Crazie One

Age – a worried 40

Booze – Not a lot, allergic to wine, don’t like beer or most spirits.

Career – Civil Servant alongside Aginoth – my area of expertise is Red Tape!

Dad's name – John

Essential Item to Bring to a Party – A Smile

Favorite Song(s)/Music – Everything from Amadeus Mozart to ZZ Top. Don’t like modern dance music though – just white noise!

Goof Off Thing To Do – Play with my cats

Hometown – Thornbury, S Glos, UK

Instrument You Play: None enough to brag!

Jam or Jelly You Like: Raspberry Seedless Jam and Lemon Curd

Kids – None – cats instead!

Living Arrangement – Still happily living in sin after 20 years

Name of Best Friend – Paul…and Pam...and Dave...and Bella...what can I say, I can’t choose.

Overnight Hospital Stays – Some – couple of road accidents and abdominal surgery

Phobias – Rodents, Clowns, Lifts, Heights, Closed Spaces – I’m just a nervous wreck

Quote You Like – There’s no such thing as a stupid question, only a stupid answer

Relationship That Lasted the Longest – With He Who Must Be Obeyed – 20 years

Siblings – 3. Two brothers. One sister

True love, ever had? – definitely

Unique Trait – Quality Sparkle – I’ll be referring to that sometime….

Vegetable You Love – Carrots

Worst Trait – Shyness – overcompensated for by dominance

X-rays you've had – Some. Mostly spinal

Yummy Food You Make – Cheese risotto – love it. HWMBO hates it, so I have it when he’s away :-)

Zodiac Sign – I’m a Dragon

Inanimate Hatred

I was wondering today, as I eyed my exercise bike sourly before reluctantly getting on and starting to - er - it possible to hate an inanimate object?

Because if it is - I hate my exercise bike. It's so smug, sitting there, and I hate every inch of it.

Or perhaps it's more that I hate myself for being weak? Or maybe I hate myself for being stupid enough to sign up for skiing lessons at the grand old age of 40!

But I did my exercises, and I had my fresh fruit for dessert, and I longed for a piece (just a little piece! just one piece!) of chocolate.......

So another day fades, and I have achieved my exercise regime - one day closer to my first Gold Star and one day closer to my Basic Skiing Proficiency.

Oh - did I not mention my Gold Stars? Silly Me :-) For my training regime I have two Consciences; one at home (He Who Must Be Obeyed) and one at work (My Pumpkin). My Pumpkin is armed with stars, of the Gold and Silver Variety, and each week I go armed with my ticked off training regime and My Pumpkin assesses my week's efforts and issues appropriate Starrage. So I get to earn Gold Stars. Don't be fooled folks, even us adults like to earn a Gold Star now and then, a pat on the back, a 'well done, old bean'.

Only 4 months to go and I can throw the bloody bike away :-D


Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Welcome to It's a Cat's Life

Having been nagged half to death by Aginoth to start my own blog - here it is.

Isn't starting a blog horrible, the whole 'blank page' bit? [shudder]

This blog is intended to be a diary of sorts. At an advanced age, I have arranged to go skiing for the first time in my life. Luckily I am able to have the best instruction.
Due to leave at the end of January, now starts my fitness routine, so I don't go all girly on the slopes!! :-)

I bet you were all wondering what the 'Cat' reference is? Well, not being blessed(!) with children, I have two cats; Pandora (16 and a bit of a bitch) and Charlie (4 months and cute as a flea).
I am sure my animals will appear regularly in my blog.